The Diary Of Desiree

The Diary of Desiree

   

  By Marissa Steidl

   

  Copyright 2014 by Marissa Steidl

   

   

  Table of Contents

  About Marissa Steidl

  Other Works by Marissa Steidl

  Connect with Marissa Steidl

   

  Chapter 1

  Okay so my grandma gave me this journal. She told me to write down my thoughts, hopes and dreams. The thing is, I'm not sure there is anything to write down. I mean my life isn't that great and my grandparents are stuck trying to be the parents I don't have anymore. I guess I should elaborate on what I mean.

   

  My parents are not dead. Which makes it pretty confusing, that my grandparents are my legal guardians. You see my parents got divorced five years ago. At the time I was ten, and devastated. The thing was, I didn't want to choose over I had to live with. I had loved both my parents. But they insisted I choose.

   

  I could choose option A) my mom who cares more about her job, then her own family. The only time I hear 'I love you Desiree' is when my mom did something to embarrass me. And even then, she buys me something to make up for it. Which you know was cool at first, but got really annoying after a year of it.

   

  Or I could go with option B) my dad who works late, hangs with his buddies all the time and never even stopped to say 'I love you'. I tried all my life to get his attention, make him proud but it never worked. So instead of being the perfect daughter, I started acting out. Got into fist fights, cursed at teachers.

   

  And finally there was option C) live with my kick butt grandparents. They love me and tell me this everyday. Their house is pretty dang big. So I chose to live with my grandma and grandpa. Okay so it didn't really work all that well. My mom and dad were furious that I would chose anyone else over them. So my grandparents, seeing I was unhappy, to my parents to court and won custody of me.

   

  So now I'm fifteen and I live with my grandparents. I no longer punch people, which continued for a while after the divorce. I see a counselor sometimes. I have only one friend, and I pretty much avoid talking to guys. The only person that wanted anything to do with me, is Brianna my best friend. She admired my strength.

   

  Oh well you look at that, its time for bed. Well maybe I'll write in this thing again tomorrow.

  Chapter 2

  So I decided to write again. Earlier when I was trying to eat breakfast, grandpa came in and kissed grandma. Yes I know that's normal. But still I grossed out, and pretended to gag.

   

  I was like, that's yuckers, I'm trying to eat! Grandma just rolled her eyes, and told me one day I'll be grossing my grand-kids out. That made me laugh.

   

  My dad called today. When I heard his voice, I told him to go bite a big one. I do this every time he calls. Then mom called, and I told her not to call me ever again.

   

  As you can tell, I'm not fond of my parents.

  Chapter 3

  Have you ever had a really weird dream? Like so weird, that there were some really weird people that are like creepy and happy all the time.

   

  Well I did, and I woke up screaming. Mickey Mouse was there and he was really happy and nice at first. But then he started talking to himself. So I ran off.

   

  Then I was with Cinderella. She wasn't nice at all. Instead she started running around, asking if I had seen her slipper. When I said no, a pair of scissors materialized in her hands. She tried to cut my hair.

  Oh let's not forget everyone else. There was the guy from the Halloween movies, the evil witch from snow white and my parents. Let's go in order, shall we?

   

  The guy from Halloween started chasing me with a knife. And for a while I was running, but then I realized it's my dream. So I marched up to him, whipped the knife away, and told the dude what a weak sicko he is. He blinked at me and ran away.

   

  The witch tried to get me to eat the poison apple, so I crammed it in her mouth, and told her to eat it.

   

  The worst part though, was my parents.

   

  It was just like it was when I was ten. They yelled at me to choose. I kept saying no, that I loved them both. But they wouldn't stop, I started crying. I hated them for trying to make me choose.

  I hate dreams like that, because they always turn into nightmares.

  Chapter 4

  Today has been the worst day ever. I woke up happy to see sunshine pouring through my window, hoping that today would be a good day. I even walked downstairs humming. That's how happy I had been. Until Grandma told me the bad news, I would be spending this gorgeous day with my parents.

   

  I'll be honest with you, I did run back upstairs to hide. Apparently though, my parents were already here and trying to hide only made them mad. Can you blame though? My mom can make it storm; not even joking. When she steps outside, it begins to rain.

   

  So I spent the day with them, running in places out of the rain. I even tried jumping out of the car while it was moving. Actually surprised my dad, guess he's not used to people trying to escape spending time with him. After my attempt failed, I sat in my seat and glared at my parents.

   

  We went shopping and out to lunch, which sucked. I saw people I knew, who saw me, started to come over but stopped when they saw my parents. They just naturally repel people. Even the waiter didn't want to come back. My day was of course ruined.

   

  Well it's time for dinner. Or death. Whatever comes first.

  Chapter 5

  Grandma asked me how spending time with my parents was. I of course told her the truth; that you cannot jump out of a moving vehicle no matter how determined you are.  She of course just shook her head and smiled, while grandpa gave me a look of horror. I remember exactly what he said, mainly because it was just five minutes ago.

   

  "You tried to jump out of the moving car?" He asks, disbelief all over his face.

   

  "Well yeah." Poking at my mashed potatoes, watching as the gravy runs down the sides of my mini food volcano.

   

  "Why would you do something so dangerous?" Alarm filling his eyes.

   

  "Hello have you spent time with them recently?" Stabbing my chicken over and over, pretending its someone who is evil and after me.

   

  He of course did not respond after that. Instead finished his food and went to watch some game on T.V. and I came up here to write in my diary. Sometimes I just wonder if anyone will ever stop and consider my feelings, instead of just assuming they know what's best for me.  Nothing about my life has been easy, or at least not recently.

  Chapter 6

  I'm tired and lazy. Mom and dad dropped by but grandma told them I wasn't feeling well. They left but I felt like mom was staring at me. Like she knew I was lying, so I closed the curtains. When my mom stares at you, she can really make you feel uncomfortable. But I still felt the staring so I ran back to the window, and yes she was still there. I heaved the window open and yelled that I wasn't sick. I just didn't want to spend time with her. Then I slammed the window shut and hid under the covers.

   

  Well this is going to be a short entry. Why? Because I'm going to have dinner with devil. If I don't make it back, tell Orlando Bloom I love him.

  Chapter 7

  Well I made it out alive, which is a good thing right? Wrong. Mom wants us to have Friday nights be family dinner nights. I personally don't want to. I mean its t
he devil were talking about here. Does the devil have dinner with you on Friday nights before he takes your soul? No he just takes your soul.

   

  Mom even offered to make some food... she didn't really cook much before. So I may or may not die. We'll just have to wait and see.

  Chapter 8

  Well I didn't die...so that counts for something right? Didn't even throw up, though I can't guarantee I won't later. Mom made chicken Alfredo, which isn't that hard to make, but some of the noodles were hard as a rock. But I just plastered a smile on my face and acted like it was the greatest meal in the world.

   

  And then we went home, and I went to sleep. Uh oh I can taste puke, better go before I through up all over my bed.

  Chapter 9

  Well I lost you for a while dearest diary. So I guess it's time for an update. It is the beginning of August, and school starts in a few weeks which sucks but I will be a sophomore! Mom and dad are the same as always, fighting with each other. I still refuse to spend time alone with them.

   

  I got a job as lifeguard at the pool which lasted a week, as I pushed this really rude girl from school into the pool when she was talking to my co-worker, Derek who is ridiculously cute. I of course thought it was hilarious, as did Derek, however Cindy and my boss did not.

   

  I still go to the pool and talk to Derek though. He's hilarious and sweet. Mm well I'm exhausted so this is it for now.

  Chapter 10

  OMG I CAN'T BREATHE OMG OMG!!! HE ASKED ME OUT HOLY CRAP.

   

  Okay I'm calm now, I swear. Nope I lied, still freaking out. Normally I avoid talking to boys but he was so nice and then today Derek asked ME out! In yo face Cindy buttmunch, mwahahaha. This is officially the best day ever.

   

  But what do I wear? Gotta go call Brianna!

  Chapter 11

  BOYS ARE SO FRUSTRATING, THEY MAKE ME WANNA RIP MY HAIR OUT OF MY HEAD!

   

  Just because he's cute doesn't mean I don't want to throttle him at times. I assumed when Derek asked me out, to the movies, that he meant the two of us. NOPE. It was a group of, including Cindy and I swear I will kick her ass. I mean can the boy just not tell or is he shy?

   

  I'm hoping he's just shy. I really, really, really hope that's it. Ugh I'm gonna go eat a pint of ice cream and watch a Cinderella story. 

  Chapter 12

  I've been locked outside, and I'm honestly not joking. Grandma says its time to get back on the horse, though I'm 85% sure its because I haven't left my room in a week. So maybe its a little messy, just a few ice creams containers…less then ten I swear.

   

  So now I'm sitting in a tree, with nothing to do. I bet evil Cindy buttmunch is just enjoying my absence at the pool. How I loathe that rat. Maybe I should explain why I dislike her so much. It's not because she's trying to sink her clams into Derek, though it doesn't help. For years she tortured me, specifically after I just found out about the divorce. One day I got sick of it and punched her, which led to a fight with different groups cheering me and her on. 

   

  It was only a few minutes before the teacher found us and broke it up. I got detention for a week and the little rat got a slap on the wrist. To this day I am still reminded of that fight by her and her stupid crew of friends. But I will not lose Derek to her. That's it, I'm going to the pool.

  Chapter 13

  Today was not only a bust at the pool but I officially hate Derek. Lets start from the beginning shall we?

   

  After making my way down there I couldn't find him any where. So I find somewhere to it and wait, when his friend Ian comes over. We chat for a bit, and eventually I excuse myself and head over to the restrooms. There I stumble upon Derek and the she-devil together, and I was pissed. So I left, leaving my shoes behind, which hurt like hell walking on hot pavement. 

   

  Not a chance though that I would go back, which means I arrived home with blisters all over my feet. I'm currently sitting on the edge of the bathtub, soaking my feet in cool water while I wait for Brianna to come over. Boys suck.

  Chapter 14

  Brianna's downstairs, making popcorn and grabbing a couple spoons, so this will be a quick entry. Mom stopped by early and grandma gave her the run down of why I was so upset. Couldn't even bring myself to be  sarcastic to her. Then deciding to take on the motherly role, she sat me down and talked to me.

   

  She told me that there would be other guys and that someday Cindy would be working for me. At the time it made me feel a bit better but not much. I guess she tried though. Well this is depressing and I can hear footsteps, so this is all for now.

  Chapter 15

  Well Ian stopped by around, oh 3 am? I can't remember the exact time, I was exhausted. He came back with my shoes and to say that Derek is kinda an ass. Which isn't that hard to figure out. But I will live, because it was just a crush. And anyone that falls for Cindy's tricks are not worth it. Anyways back to Ian. I offered to come outside to get my shoes, but he just climbed up the trellis outside my room, and handed me back my shoes. It was very sweet of him, considering we just met earlier today.

   

  Of course Grandpa walks into my room at that moment, to find a boy in my room. And while this maybe didn't cross his mind as something that would happen tonight, but there we were. Although he did not freak out. having already raised a teenage girl before. Instead he said hello, and shook Ian's hand, and I explained he was a friend from the pool who brought my shoes back because I forgot about them. No further explanation needed, and Ian now has a standing invitation to come over for dinner.

   

  Brianna missed all of this, as she was passed out on my bed, so now she's hounding me for the details. Which means its time for me to go.

  Chapter 16

  So Ian came over today, and we went for a walk. And talked a lot. I'm sure you're thinking this sounds so painfully boring. But it was nice, we skipped stones down at the lake. And of course given my luck, we ran into Cindy and Derek. Well we saw them out on the water in a boat. She had a gleeful smirk on her face, and Derek just waved. 

   

  Now I'm sure he was trying to be romantic, with the boat and picnic basket. But they ended up looking ridiculous. Because the boat ended up tipping over, taking down both of them. And then I was the one smirking. Of course rather than helping them, both Ian and I just started laughing until we couldn't breathe, tears rolling down our cheeks. 

   

  Once we finally caught our breath, the both of them had finally swam ashore, dripping wet and visibly unhappy, Cindy's race was so red, she looked like a tomato. Which sent the two of us into hysterics again. After we finally calmed down, we headed back to my house, and Grandpa invited him to stay for dinner.

   

  We talked about our days, and learned that Ian is a grade above me. Which means he'll be a senior this year, while I'm a junior. And after dinner, I walked him to the door and thanked him for a nice day. Well I'm tired, so time to wrap this up.

  Chapter 17

  Well the 4th of July is Friday, and Monday is my 17th birthday!! And I'm excited for it! Brianna's been helping me plan what we should do. Yeah I could have a big party, but I decided I'd rather hang out with my best friend instead. So movies, sweets and pizza. And of course she's going to spend the night. Hard to believe it's already been a year since I moved in with my grandparents.

   

   I'm just so excited!!

  Chapter 18

  Okay so mom and dad just came by for dinner, and had some interesting news for us. And by interesting I mean it sucks. Instead of my original plans of kicking back with Brianna for my birthday, I'm going to be spending the day with them. Yes a day as a family, even if two of them despise each other, and the third would rather they just stopped trying to get her to take sides.

   
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  They even promised to be civil with each other. Which I have to see with my own eyes to believe. This is going to be a disaster, I just know it is. And judging by the barrage of questions, they're going to try to out gift each other. Which is great and stuff, but if they really want to get me the perfect gift, then they will stop trying to one up one another by using me. It's like a war, and I'm caught in the crossfire. At least grandma and grandpa will be with of us.

   

  I am truly grateful for them. I mean not everyone would be willing to raise their 15 year old granddaughter. Even fewer would put up with them getting into fights, just the one time but still, and finding boys in her bedroom, again just the one. But they do it all and still smile at the end of the day. They're the best grandparents anyone could ask for.

  Chapter 19

  I'm headed down to the pool to meet with Bri, so I'm going to make this entry quick. We've rescheduled for Tuesday, which is good because after dinner with my parents, I'm going to need some time to just relax. Just hanging with my bff. Also my cousin, Hannah is coming to town, tomorrow, which means that she'll be here for my birthday as well. And we can all hang out together. She's super nice and fun.

   

  Although she got the better genes in our family; blonde hair and blue eyes, whereas your's truly is brown hair brown eyed, though I plan to change my hair color soon. She looks just like Aunt Jean, who will be here too. And can act as mediator at dinner on Monday night. You know in case the 'rents go to far, and cause a scene.

   

  In other news, my crush on Derek is long gone. And has been replaced by a new crush on Ian. Well it's getting late and I've got to get going.

  Chapter 20

  Happy 4th of July! I'm getting ready to go  watch fireworks down by the lake with Hannah, Bri and Ian. Who is actually waiting downstairs for me, so I better hurry. I still really like him, more than I did what's his name, and definitely more than Orlando Bloom. Sorry Orlando, but I'm going with someone who is attainable.

   

  Well time to wrap this up, I can hear Hannah yelling at me to get down there already.

  Chapter 21

  I think Hannah might like Ian, I mean she sat between him and Brianna the entire time at the lake. Hope I'm wrong, because I really like him. But maybe he doesn't like her, because he didn't really pay much attention to her. I mean he was nice and made small talk, but he didn't start flirting with her.

   

  This would be a longer entry, but it's been a long night and I'm tired. So more tomorrow, hopefully with different news.

  Chapter 22